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The Adventures of Peregrine Pickle

T >> Tobias Smollett >> The Adventures of Peregrine Pickle




Having dressed himself, and repaired to the place of appointment,
he despatched this epistle by the hands of Pipes, who was ordered
to leave it at her ladyship's house, without staying for an answer;
and in the meantime gave directions for dinner, which he and his
friend Hatchway ate very cheerfully in his own apartment, after
he had entertained him with a sight of all the curiosities in the
place. During their repast, Jack repeated his kind offers to our
adventurer, who declined them with his former obstinacy, and begged
he might be no more importuned on that subject; but if he insisted
upon giving some fresh proofs of his friendship, he might have an
opportunity of exhibiting it in taking Pipes under his care and
protection; for nothing affected him so much as his inability to
provide for such a faithful adherent.

The lieutenant desired he would give himself no trouble upon that
score; he being, of his own accord, perfectly well disposed to
befriend his old shipmate, who should never want while he had a
shilling to spare. But he began to drop some hints of an intention
to fix his quarters in the Fleet, observing, that the air seemed
to be very good in that place, and that he was tired of living in
the country. What he said did not amount to a plain declaration, and
therefore Peregrine did not answer it as such, though he perceived
his drift; and took an opportunity of describing the inconveniences
of the place, in such a manner as, he hoped, would deter him from
putting such an extravagant plan in execution.

This expedient, however, far from answering the end proposed, had
a quite contrary effect, and furnished Hatchway with an argument
against his own unwillingness to quit such a disagreeable place.
In all probability, Jack would have been more explicit with regard
to the scheme he had proposed, if the conversation had not been
interrupted by the arrival of Cadwallader, who never failed in the
performance of his diurnal visit. Hatchway, conjecturing that this
stranger might have some private business with his friend, quitted
the apartment, on pretence of taking a turn; and meeting Pipes at
the door, desired his company to the Bare, by which name the open
space is distinguished; where, during a course of perambulation,
these two companions held a council upon Pickle, in consequence of
which it was determined, since he obstinately persisted to refuse
their assistance, that they should take lodgings in his neighbourhood,
with a view of being at hand to minister unto his occasions, in spite
of his false delicacy, according to the emergency of his affairs.

This resolution being taken, they consulted the bar-keeper of the
coffee-house about lodging, and she directed them to the warden;
to whom the lieutenant, in his great wisdom, represented himself as
a kinsman to Peregrine, who, rather than leave that young gentleman
by himself to the unavoidable discomforts of a prison, was inclined
to keep him company, till such time as his affairs could be put in
order. This measure he the more anxiously desired to take, because
the prisoner was sometimes subject to a disordered imagination,
upon which occasion he stood in need of extraordinary attendance;
and therefore he, the lieutenant, entreated the warden to accommodate
him with a lodging for himself and his servant, for which he was
ready to make any reasonable acknowledgment. The warden, who was a
sensible and humane man, could not help applauding his resolution;
and several rooms being at that time unoccupied, he put him immediately
in possession of a couple, which were forthwith prepared for his
reception.

This affair being settled to his satisfaction, he despatched Pipes
for his portmanteau; and, returning to the coffee-house, found
Peregrine, with whom he spent the remaining part of the evening.
Our hero, taking it for granted that he proposed to set out for
the garrison next day, wrote a memorandum of some books which he
had left in that habitation, and which he now desired Jack to send
up to town by the waggon, directed for Mr. Crabtree. He cautioned
him against giving the least hint of his misfortune in the
neighbourhood, that it might remain, as long as possible, concealed
from the knowledge of his sister, who, he knew, would afflict
herself immoderately at the news, nor reach the ears of the rest
of his family, who would exult and triumph over his distress.

Hatchway listened to his injunctions with great attention, and
promised to demean himself accordingly. Then the discourse shifted to
an agreeable recapitulation of the merry scenes they had formerly
acted together. And the evening being pretty far advanced,
Peregrine, with seeming reluctance, told him that the gates of the
Fleet would in a few minutes be shut for the night, and that there
was an absolute necessity for his withdrawing to his lodging. Jack
replied, that he could not think of parting with him so soon, after
such a long separation; and that he was determined to stay with
him an hour or two longer, if he should be obliged to take up his
lodging in the streets. Pickle, rather than disoblige his guest,
indulged him in his desire and resolved to give him a share of his
own bed. A pair of chickens and asparagus were bespoke for supper,
at which Pipes attended with an air of internal satisfaction; and
the bottle was bandied about in a jovial manner till midnight, when
the lieutenant rose up to take his leave, observing, that, being
fatigued with riding, he was inclined to turn in. Pipes, upon this
intimation, produced a lanthorn ready lighted; and Jack, shaking
his entertainer by the hand, wished him good night, and promised
to visit him again betimes in the morning.

Peregrine, imagining that his behaviour proceeded from the wine,
which he had plentifully drunk, told him, that, if he was disposed
to sleep, his bed was ready prepared in the room, and ordered his
attendant to undress his master; upon which Mr. Hatchway gave him
to understand, that he had no occasion to incommode his friend,
having already provided a lodging for himself, and the young
gentleman demanding an explanation, he frankly owned what he had
done, saying, "You gave me such a dismal account of the place, that
I could not think of leaving you in it without company." Our young
gentleman, who was naturally impatient of benefits, and foresaw that
this uncommon instance of Hatchway's friendship would encroach upon
the plan which he had formed for his own subsistence, by engrossing
his time and attention, so as that he should not be able to prosecute
his labours, closeted the lieutenant next day, and demonstrated to
him the folly and ill consequences of the step he had taken. He
observed, that the world in general would look upon it as the effect
of mere madness; and, if his relations were so disposed, they might
make it the foundation for a statute of lunacy against him; that
his absence from the garrison must be a very great detriment to
his private affairs; and, lastly, that his presence in the Fleet
would be a very great hindrance to Pickle himself, whose hope of
regaining his liberty altogether depended upon his being detached
from all company and interruption.

To these remonstrances Jack replied, that, as to the opinion of
the world, it was no more to him than a rotten net-line; and if
his relations had a mind to have his upper works condemned, he did
not doubt but he should be able to stand the survey, without being
declared unfit for service; that he had no affairs at the garrison,
but such as would keep cold; and with regard to Pickle's being
interrupted by his presence, he gave him his word, that he would
never come alongside of him, except when he should give him the signal
for holding discourse. In conclusion, he signified his resolution
to stay where he was, at all events, without making himself
accountable to any person, whatsoever.

Peregrine seeing him determined, desisted from any further
importunity; resolving, however, to tire him out of his plan by
reserve and supercilious neglect; for he could not bear the thought
of being so notoriously obliged by any person upon earth. With this
view he quitted the lieutenant, upon some slight pretence; after
having told him, that he could not have the pleasure of his company
at dinner, because he was engaged with a particular club of his
fellow-prisoners.

Jack was a stranger to the punctilios of behaviour, and therefore
did not take this declaration amiss; but had immediate recourse
to the advice of his counsellor, Mr. Pipes, who proposed, that he
should go to the coffee-house and kitchen, and give the people to
understand that he would pay for all such liquor and provisions as
Mr. Pickle should order to be sent to his lodging. This expedient
was immediately practised; and as there was no credit in the place,
Hatchway deposited a sum of money, by way of security, to the cook
and the vintner, intimating, that there was a necessity for taking
that method of befriending his cousin Peregrine, who was subject to
strange whims, that rendered it impossible to serve him any other
way.

In consequence of these insinuations, it was that same day rumoured
about the Fleet, that Mr. Pickle was an unhappy gentleman disordered
in his understanding, and that the lieutenant was his near relation,
who had subjected himself to the inconvenience of living in a jail,
with the sole view of keeping a strict eye over his conduct. This
report, however, did not reach the ears of our hero till the next
day, when he sent one of the runners of the Fleet, who attended
him, to bespeak and pay for a couple of pullets, and something else
for dinner, to which he had already invited his friend Hatchway,
in hope of being able to persuade him to retire into the country,
after he had undergone a whole day's mortification in the place.
The messenger returned with an assurance, that the dinner should
be made ready according to his directions, and restored the money,
observing, that his kinsman had paid for what was bespoke.

Peregrine was equally surprised and disgusted at this information,
and resolved to chide the lieutenant severely for his unseasonable
treat, which he considered as a thing repugnant to his reputation.
Meanwhile, he despatched his attendant for wine to the coffee-house,
and finding his credit bolstered up in that place by the same means,
was enraged at the presumption of Jack's friendship. He questioned
the valet about it with such manifestation of displeasure, that
the fellow, afraid of disobliging such a good master, frankly
communicated the story which was circulated at his expense. The
young gentleman was so much incensed at this piece of intelligence,
that he wrote a bitter expostulation to the lieutenant, where he
not only retracted his invitation, but declared that he would never
converse with him while he should remain within the place.

Having thus obeyed the dictates of his anger, he gave notice to
the cook, that he should not have occasion for what was ordered.
Repairing to the coffee-house, he told the landlord, that whereas
he understood the stranger with the wooden leg had prepossessed him
and others with ridiculous notions, tending to bring the sanity of
his intellects in question, and, to confirm this imputation, had,
under the pretence of consanguinity, undertaken to defray his
expenses; he could not help, in justice to himself, declaring,
that the same person was, in reality, the madman, who had given
his keepers the slip; that, therefore, he, the landlord, would not
find his account in complying with his orders, and encouraging him
to frequent his house; and that, for his own part, he would never
enter the door, or favour him with the least trifle of his custom,
if ever he should for the future find himself anticipated in his
payments by that unhappy lunatic.

The vintner was confounded at this retorted charge; and, after much
perplexity and deliberation, concluded, that both parties were
distracted; the stranger in paying a man's debts against his will,
and Pickle, in being offended at such forwardness of friendship.





CHAPTER C.




These Associates commit an Assault upon Crabtree, for which they
are banished from the Fleet--Peregrine begins to feel the effects
of Confinement.


Our adventurer having dined at an ordinary, and in the afternoon
retired to his own apartment, as usual, with his friend Cadwallader,
Hatchway and his associate, after they had been obliged to discuss
the provision for which they had paid, renewed their conference
upon the old subject. Pipes giving his messmate to understand, that
Peregrine's chief confidant was the old deaf bachelor, whom he had
seen at his lodging the preceding day, Mr. Hatchway, in his great
penetration, discovered, that the young gentleman's obstinacy proceeded
from the advice of the misanthrope, whom, for that reason, it was
their business to chastise. Pipes entered into this opinion the
more willingly, as he had all along believed the senior to be a sort
of wizard, or some cacodaemon, whom it was not very creditable to
be acquainted with. Indeed, he had been inspired with this notion
by the insinuations of Hadgi, who had formerly dropped some hints
touching Crabtree's profound knowledge in the magic art; mentioning,
in particular, his being possessed of the philosopher's stone; an
assertion to which Tom had given implicit credit, until his master
was sent to prison for debt, when he could no longer suppose
Cadwallader lord of such a valuable secret, or else he would have
certainly procured the enlargement of his most intimate friend.

With these sentiments, he espoused the resentment of Hatchway.
They determined to seize the supposed conjurer, with the first
opportunity, on his return from his visit to Peregrine, and,
without hesitation, exercise upon him the discipline of the pump.
This plan they would have executed that same evening, had not the
misanthrope luckily withdrawn himself, by accident, before it was
dark, and even before they had intelligence of his retreat. But,
next day, they kept themselves upon the watch till he appeared, and
Pipes lifting his hat, as Crabtree passed, "O d-- ye, old Dunny,"
said he, "you and I must grapple by and by; and a'gad I shall lie
so near your quarter, that your ear-ports will let in the sound,
thof they are double caulked with oakum."

The misanthrope's ears were not quite so fast closed, but that they
received this intimation; which, though delivered in terms that he
did not well understand, had such an effect upon his apprehension,
that he signified his doubts to Peregrine, observing, that he did
not much like the looks of that same ruffian with the wooden leg.
Pickle assured him, he had nothing to fear from the two sailors,
who could have no cause of resentment against him; or, if they had,
would not venture to take any step, which they knew must block up
all the avenues to that reconcilement, about which they were so
anxious; and, moreover, give such offence to the governor of the
place as would infallibly induce him to expel them both from his
territories.

Notwithstanding this assurance, the young gentleman was not
so confident of the lieutenant's discretion, as to believe that
Crabtree's fears were altogether without foundation; he forthwith
conjectured that Jack had taken umbrage at an intimacy from which he
found himself excluded, and imputed his disgrace to the insinuations
of Cadwallader, whom, in all likelihood, he intended to punish
for his supposed advice. He knew his friend could sustain no great
damage from the lieutenant's resentment, in a place which he could
immediately alarm with his cries, and therefore wished he might
fall into the snare, because it would furnish him with a pretence
of complaint; in consequence of which, the sailors would be obliged
to shift their quarters, so as that he should be rid of their
company, in which he at present could find no enjoyment.

Everything happened as he had foreseen; the misanthrope, in his
retreat from Peregrine's chamber, was assaulted by Hatchway and his
associate, who seized him by the collar without ceremony, and began
to drag him towards the pump, at which they would have certainly
complimented him with a very disagreeable bath, had not he exalted
his voice in such a manner, as in a moment brought a number of the
inhabitants, and Pickle himself, to his aid. The assailants would
have persisted in their design, had the opposition been such as
they could have faced with any possibility of success; nor did they
quit their prey, before a dozen, at least, had come to his rescue,
and Peregrine with a menacing aspect and air of authority, commanded
his old valet to withdraw. Then they thought proper to sheer off,
and betake themselves to close quarters, while our hero accompanied
the affrighted Cadwallader to the gate, and exhibited to the warden
a formal complaint against the rioters, upon whom he retorted the
charge of lunacy, which was supported by the evidence of twenty
persons, who had been eye-witnesses of the outrage committed against
the old gentleman. The governor, in consequence of this information,
sent a message to Mr. Hatchway, warning him to move his lodging
next day, on pain of being expelled. The lieutenant contumaciously
refusing to comply with this intimation, was in the morning, while
he amused himself in walking upon the Bare, suddenly surrounded by
the constables of the court, who took him and his adherent prisoners,
before they were aware, and delivered them into the hands of the
turnkeys, by whom they were immediately dismissed, and their baggage
conveyed to the side of the ditch.

This expulsion was not performed without an obstinate opposition
on the part of the delinquents, who, had they not been surprised,
would have set the whole Fleet at defiance, and, in all probability,
have acted divers tragedies, before they could have been overpowered.
Things being circumstanced as they were, the lieutenant did not part
with his conductor without tweaking his nose, by way of farewell;
and Pipes, in imitation of such a laudable example, communicated
a token of remembrance, in an application to the sole eye of his
attendant, who, scorning to be outdone in this kind of courtesy,
returned the compliment with such good-will, that Tom's organ
performed the office of a multiplying-glass. These were mutual
hints for stripping, and, accordingly, each was naked from the
waist upwards in a trice. A ring of butchers from the market was
immediately formed; a couple of the reverend flamens, who, in morning
gowns, ply for marriages in that quarter of the town, constituted
themselves seconds and umpires of the approaching contest, and
the battle began without further preparation. The combatants were,
in point of strength and agility, pretty equally matched; but the
jailor had been regularly trained in the art of bruising: he had
more than once signalized himself in public, by his prowess and
skill in this exercise, and lost one eye upon the stage in the
course of his exploits. This was a misfortune of which Pipes did
not fail to take the advantage. He had already sustained several
hard knocks upon his temples and jaws, and found it impracticable
to smite his antagonist upon the victualling-office, so dexterously
was it defended against assault. He then changed his battery, and
being ambidexter, raised such a clatter upon the turnkey's blind
side, that this hero, believing him left-handed, converted his
attention that way, and opposed the unenlightened side of his face
to the right hand of Pipes, which being thus unprovided against,
slyly bestowed upon him a peg under the fifth rib, that in an instant
laid him senseless on the pavement, at the feet of his conqueror.
Pipes was congratulated upon his victory, not only by his friend
Hatchway, but also by all the by-standers, particularly the priest
who had espoused his cause, and now invited the strangers to his
lodgings in a neighbouring alehouse, where they were entertained
so much to their liking, that they determined to seek no other
habitation while they should continue in town; and, notwithstanding
the disgrace and discouragement they had met with, in their endeavours
to serve our adventurer, they were still resolved to persevere in
their good offices, or, in the vulgar phrase, to see him out.

While they settled themselves in this manner, and acquired familiar
connections round all the purlieus of the ditch, Peregrine found
himself deprived of the company of Cadwallader, who signified, by
letter, that he did not choose to hazard his person again in visiting
him, while such assassins occupied the avenues through which he
must pass; for he had been at pains to inquire into the motions of
the seamen, and informed himself exactly of the harbour in which
they were moored.

Our hero had been so much accustomed to the conversation of
Crabtree, which was altogether suitable to the singularity of his
own disposition, that he could very ill afford to be debarred of
it at this juncture, when almost every other source of enjoyment
was stopped. He was, however, obliged to submit to the hardships
of his situation; and as the characters of his fellow-prisoners
did not at all improve upon him, he was compelled to seek for
satisfaction within himself. Not but that he had an opportunity
of conversing with some people who neither wanted sense, nor were
deficient in point of principle; yet there appeared in the behaviour
of them all, without exception, a certain want of decorum, a squalor
of sentiment, a sort of jailish cast contracted in the course of
confinement, which disgusted the delicacy of our hero's observation.
He, therefore, detached himself from their parties as much as he
could, without giving offence to those among whom he was obliged
to live, and resumed his labours with incredible eagerness and
perseverance, his spirits being supported by the success of some
severe philippics, which he occasionally published against the
author of his misfortune.

Nor was his humanity unemployed in the vacations of his revenge.
A man must be void of all sympathy and compassion, who can reside
among so many miserable objects, without feeling an inclination
to relieve their distress. Every day almost presented to his view
such lamentable scenes as were most likely to attract his notice,
and engage his benevolence. Reverses of fortune, attended with the
most deplorable circumstances of domestic woe, were continually
intruding upon his acquaintance; his ears were invaded with the
cries of the hapless wife, who, from the enjoyment of affluence
and pleasure, was forced to follow her husband to this abode of
wretchedness and want; his eyes were every minute assailed with
the naked and meagre appearances of hunger and cold; and his fancy
teemed with a thousand aggravations of their misery.

Thus situated, his purse was never shut while his heart remained
open. Without reflecting upon the slenderness of his store, he
exercised his charity to all the children of distress, and acquired
a popularity, which, though pleasing, was far from being profitable.
In short, his bounty kept no pace with his circumstances,
and in a little time he was utterly exhausted. He had recourse to
his bookseller, from whom, with great difficulty, he obtained a
small reinforcement; and immediately relapsed into the same want
of retention. He was conscious of his infirmity, and found it
incurable: he foresaw that by his own industry he should never be
able to defray the expense of these occasions; and this reflection
sunk deep into his mind. The approbation of the public, which he
had earned or might acquire like a cordial often repeated, began
to lose its effect upon his imagination; his health suffered by
his sedentary life and austere application, his eyesight failed,
his appetite forsook him, his spirits decayed; so that he became
melancholy, listless, and altogether incapable of prosecuting
the only means he had left for his subsistence; and, what did not
at all contribute to the alleviation of these particulars, he was
given to understand by his lawyer, that he had lost his cause,
and was condemned in costs. Even this was not the most mortifying
piece of intelligence he received: he at the same time learned that
his bookseller was bankrupt, and his friend Crabtree at the point
of death.

These were comfortable considerations to a youth of Peregrine's
disposition, which was so capricious, that the more his misery
increased, the more haughty and inflexible he became. Rather than
be beholden to Hatchway, who still hovered about the gate, eager
for an opportunity to assist him, he chose to undergo the want of
almost every convenience of life, and actually pledged his wearing
apparel to an Irish pawnbroker in the Fleet, for money to purchase
those things, without which he must have absolutely perished. He was
gradually irritated by his misfortunes into a rancorous resentment
against mankind in general, and his heart so alienated from
the enjoyments of life, that he did not care how soon he quitted
his miserable existence. Though he had shocking examples of the
vicissitudes of fortune continually before his eyes, he could never
be reconciled to the idea of living like his fellow-sufferers,
in the most abject degree of dependence. If he refused to accept
of favours from his own allies and intimate friends, whom he had
formerly obliged, it is not to be supposed that he would listen to
proposals of that kind from any of his fellow-prisoners, with whom
he had contracted acquaintance: he was even more cautious than ever
of incurring obligations; he now shunned his former messmates, in
order to avoid disagreeable tenders of friendship. Imagining that
he perceived an inclination in the clergyman to learn the state of
his finances, he discouraged and declined the explanation, and at
length secluded himself from all society.

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