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Samantha at Saratoga

M >> Marietta Holley >> Samantha at Saratoga




Yes, it made it dretful bad for Miss Flamm that her health was so
poor, and her fashionable engagements so many and arduous that
she didn't have the time to take a little care of her children
and the dog too. For you could see plain, by the care that she
took of that dog, what a splendid hand she would be with the
children, if she only had the time and health.

Why, I don't believe there wuz another dog in America, either the
upper or lower continent, that had more lovin', anxus,
intelligent, devoted attention than that dog had, day and night,
from Miss Flamm. She took 2 dog papers, so they say, to get the
latest information on the subject; she compared notes with other
dog wimmen, I don't say it in a runnin' way at all. I mean
wimmen who have gin their hull minds to dog, havin', some on 'em,
renounced husbands, and mothers, and children for dog sake.

You know there are sich wimmen, and Miss Flamm read up and
studied with constant and absorbed attention all the latest
things on dog. Their habits, their diet, their baths, their
robes, their ribbons, and bells, and collars, their barks --
nothin' escaped her; she put the best things she learned into
practice, and studied out new ones for herself. She said she had
reduced the subject to a science, and she boasted proudly that
her dog, the last one she had, went ahead of any dog in the
country. And I don't know but it did. I knew it had a good
healthy bark. A loud strong bark that must have made it bad for
her in the night. It always slept with her, for she didn't dast
to trust it out of her sight nights. It had had some spells in
the night, kinder chills, or spuzzums like, and she didn't dast
to be away from it for a minute.

She wouldn't let the wet nurse tech it, for her youngest child,
little G. Washington Flamm, Jr., wuzn't very healthy, and Miss
Flamm thought that mebby the dog might ketch his weakness if the
nurse handled it right after she had been nursin' the baby. And
then she objected to the nurse, so I hearn, on account of her
bein' wet. She wanted to keep the dog dry. I hearn this; I
don't know as it wuz so. But I hearn these things long enough
before I ever see her. And when I did see her I see that they
didn't tell me no lies about her devotion to the dog, for she
jest worshiped it, that was plain to be seen.

Wall, she has got a splendid place at Saratoga; a cottage she
calls it. I, myself, should call it a house, for it is big as
our house and Deacon Peddick'ses and Mr. Bobbett'ses all put
together, and I don't know but bigger.

Wall, she invited Josiah and me to drive with her, and so her dog
and she stopped for us. (I put the dog first, for truly she
seemed to put him forward on every occasion in front of herself,
and so did her high-toned relatives, who wuz with her.)

Or I s'pose they wuz her relatives for they sot up straight, and
wuz dretful dressed up, and acted awful big-feelin' and never
took no notice of Josiah and me, no more than if we hadn't been
there. But good land! I didn't care for that. What if they
didn't pay any attention to us? But Josiah, on account of his
tryin' to be so fashionable, felt it deeply, and he sez to me
while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' down over the dog, a talkin' to
him, for truly it wuz tired completely out a barkin' at Josiah,
it had barked at him every single minute sense we had started,
and she wuz a talkin' earnest to it a tryin' to soothe it, and
Josiah whispered to me, "I'll tell you, Samantha, why them
fellers feel above me; it is because I haint dressed up in sech a
dressy fashion. Let me once have on a suit like their'n, white
legs and yellow trimmin's, and big shinin' buttons sot on in
rows, and white gloves, and rosettes in my hat -- why I could
appear in jest as good company as they go in."

Sez I, "You are too old to be dressed up so gay, Josiah Allen.
There is a time for all things. Gay buttons and rosettes look
well with brown hair and sound teeth, but they ort to gently pass
away when they do. Don't talk any more about it, Josiah, for I
tell you plain, you are too old to dress like them, they are
young men."

"Wall," he whispered, in deep resolve, "I will have a white
rosette in my hat, Samantha. I will go so far, old or not old.
What a sensation it will create in the Jonesville meetin'-house
to see me come a walkin' proudly in, with a white rosette in my
hat."

"You are goin' to walk into meetin' with your hat on, are you?"
sez I coldly.

"Oh, ketch a feller up. You know what I mean. And don't you
think I'll make a show? Won't it create a sensation in
Jonesville?"

Sez I: "Most probable it would. But you haint a goin' to wear no
bows on your hat at your age, not if I can break it up," sez I.

He looked almost black at me, and sez he, "Don't go too fur,
Samantha! I'll own you've been a good wife and mother and all
that, but there is a line that you must stop at. You mustn't go
too fur. There is some things in which a man must be footloose,
and that is in the matter of dress. I shall have a white rosette
on my hat, and some big white buttons up and down the back of my
overcoat! That is my aim, Samantha, and I shall reach it if I
walk through goar."

He uttered them fearful words in a loud fierce whisper which made
the dog bark at him for more'n ten minutes stiddy, at the top of
its voice, and in quick short yelps.

If it had been her young child that wuz yellin' at a visitor in
that way and ketchin' holt of him, and tearin' at his clothes,
the child would have been consigned to banishment out of the
room, and mebby punishment. But it wuzn't her babe and so it
remained, and it dug its feet down into the satin and laces and
beads of Miss Flamm's dress, and barked to that extent that we
couldn't hear ourselves think.

And she called it "sweet little angel," and told it it might
"bark its little cunnin' bark." The idee of a angel barkin';
jest think on't. And we endured it as best we could with shakin'
nerves and achin' earpans.

It wuz a curius time. The dog harrowin' our nerve, and snappin'
at Josiah anon, if not oftener, and ketchin' holt of him
anywhere, and she a callin' it a angel; and Josiah a lookin' so
voyalent at it, that it seemed almost as if that glance could
stun it.

It wuz a curius seen. But truly worse wuz to come, for Miss
Flamm in an interval of silence, sez, "We will go first to the
Gizer Spring, and then, afterwards, to the Moon."

Or, that is what I understand her to say. And though I kep'
still, I wuz determined to keep my eyes out, and if I see her
goin' into anything dangerus, I wuz goin' to reject her overtures
to take us. But thinkses I to myself, "We always said I believed
we should travel to the stars some time, but I little thought it
would be to-day, or that I should go in a buggy."

Josiah shared my feelin's I could see, for he whispered to me,
"Don't le's go, Samantha, it must be dangerus!"

But I whispered back, "Le's wait, Josiah, and see. We won't do
nothin' percipitate, but," sez I, "this is a chance that we most
probable never will have ag'in. Don't le's be hasty." We talked
these things in secret, while Miss Flamm wuz a bendin' over, and
conversin' with the dog. For Josiah would ruther have died than
not be s'pozed to be "Oh Fay," as Maggie would say, in everything
fashionable. And it has always been my way to wait and see, and
count 10, or even 20, before speakin'.

And then Miss Flamin sez sunthin' about what beautiful fried
potatoes you could get there in the moon, and you could always
get them, any time you wanted 'em.

And the very next time she went to kissin' the dog so voyalently
as not to notice us, my Josiah whispered to me and sez, "Did you
have any idee that wuz what the old man wuz a doin'? I knew he
wuz always a settin' up there in the moon, but it never passed my
mind that he wuz a fryin' potatoes."

But I sez, "Keep still, Josiah. It is a deep subject, a great
undertakin', and it requires caution and deliberation."

But he sez,"I haint a goin', Samantha! Nor I haint a goin' to
let you go. It is dangerus."

But I kinder nudged him, for she had the dog down on her lap, and
was ready to resoom conversation. And about that time we got to
the entrance of the spring, and one of her relatives got down and
opened the carriage door.

I wondered ag'in that she didn't introduce us. But I didn't care
if she didn't. I felt that I wuz jest as good as they wuz, if
they wuz so haughty. But Josiah wantin' to make himself
agreeable to 'em (he hankers after gettin' into high society), he
took off his hat and bowed low to 'em, before he got out, and sez
he, "I am proud to know you, sir," and tried to shake hands with
him. But the man rejected his overtoors and looked perfectly
wooden, and oninterested. A big-feelin', high-headed creeter.
Josiah Allen is as good as he is any day. And I whispered to him
and sez, "Don't demean yourself by tryin' to force your company
onto them any more."

"Wall," he whispered back, "I do love to move in high circles."

Sez I, "Then I shouldn't think you would be so afraid of the
undertakin' ahead on us. If neighborin' with the old man in the
moon, and eatin' supper with him, haint movin' in high circles,
then I don't know what is."

"But I don't want to go into anything dangerus," sez he.

But jest then Miss Flamm.spoke to me, and I moved forward by her
side and into a middlin' big room, and in the middle wuz a great
sort of a well like, with the water a bubblin' up into a clear
crystal globe, and a sprayin' up out of it, in a slender misty
sparklin' spray. It wuz a pretty sight. And we drinked a glass
full of it a piece, and then we wandered out of the back
door-way, and went down into the pretty; old-fashioned garden
back of the house.

Josiah and me and Miss Flamm went. The dog and the two relatives
didn't seem to want to go. The relatives sot up there straight
as two sticks, one of 'em holdin' the dog, and they didn't even
look round at us.

"Felt too big to go with us," sez Josiah, bitterly, as we went
down the steps. "They won't associate with me."

"Wall, I wouldn't care if I wuz in your place, Josiah Allen," sez
I, "you are jest as good as they be, and I know it."

"You couldn't make 'em think so, dumb 'em," sez he.

I liked the looks of it down there. It seems sometimes as if
Happiness gets kinder homesick, in the big dusty fashionable
places, and so goes back to the wild, green wood, and kinder
wanders off, and loafs round, amongst the pine trees, and cool
sparklin' brooks and wild flowers and long shinin' grasses and
slate stuns, and etc., etc.

I don't believe she likes it half so well up in the big hotel
gardens or Courtin' yards, as she does down there. You see it
seems as if Happiness would have to be more dressed up, up there,
and girted down, and stiff actin', and on her good behavior, and
afraid of actin' or lookin' onfashionable. But down here by the
side of the quiet little brook, amongst the cool, green grasses,
fur away from diamonds, and satins, and big words, and dogs, and
parasols, and so many, many that are a chasin' of her and a
follerin' of her up, it seemed more as if she loved to get away
from it all, and get where she could take her crown off, lay down
her septer, onhook her corset, and put on a long loose gown, and
lounge round and enjoy herself (metafor).

We had a happy time there. We went over the little rustick
bridges which would have been spilte in my eyes if they had been
rounded off on the edges, or a mite of paint on 'em. Truly, I
felt that I had seen enough of paint and gildin' to last me
through a long life, and it did seem such a treat to me to see a
board ag'in, jest a plain rough bass-wood board, and some stuns a
lyin' in the road, and some deep tall grass that you had to sort
a wade through.

Miss Flamm seemed to enjoy it some down there, though she spoke
of the dog, which she had left up with her relatives.

"3 big-feelin' ones together," I whispered to Josiah.

And he sez, "Yes, that dog is a big-feelin' little cuss-tomer.
And if I wuz a chipmunk he couldn't bark at me no more than he
duz."

And I looked severe at Josiah and sez I, "If you don't jine your
syllables closer together you will see trouble, Josiah Allen.
You'll find yourself swearin' before you know it."

"Oh shaw, sez he, "customer haint a swearin' word; ministers use
it. I've hearn 'em many a time."

"Yes," sez I, "but they don't draw it out as you did, Josiah
Allen."

"Oh! wall! Folks can't always speak up pert and quick when they
are off on pleasure exertions and have been barked at as long as
I have been. But now I've got a minutes chance," sez he, "let me
tell you ag'in, don't you make no arraingments to go to the Moon.
It is dangerus, and I won't go myself, nor let you go."

"Let," sez I to myself. "That is rather of a gaulin' word to me.
Won't let me go." But then I thought ag'in, and thought how love
and tenderness wuz a dictatin' the term, and I thought to myself,
it has a good sound to me, I like the word. I love to hear him
say he won't let me go.

And truly to me it looked hazerdus. But Miss Flamm seemed ready
to go on, and onwillin'ly I followed on after her footsteps. But
I looked 'round, and said "Good-bye" in my heart, to the fine
trees, and cleer, brown waters of the brook, the grass, and the
wild flowers, and the sweet peace that wuz over all.

"Good-bye," sez I. "If I don't see you ag'in, you'll find some
other lover that will appreciate you, though I am fur away."

They didn't answer me back, none on 'em, but I felt that they
understood me. The pines whispered sunthin' to each other, and
the brook put its moist lips up to the pebbly shore and whispered
sunthin' to the grasses that bent down to hear it. I don't know
exactly what it wuz, but it wuz sunthin' friendly I know, for I
felt it speak right through the soft, summer sunshine into my
heart. They couldn't exactly tell what they felt towards me, and
I couldn't exactly tell what I felt towards them, yet we
understood each other; curi'us, haint it?

Wall, we got into the carriage ag'in, one of her relatives
gettin' down to open the door. They knew what good manners is;
I'll say that for 'em. And Miss Flamm took her dog into her arms
seemin'ly glad to get holt of him ag'in, and kissed it several
times with a deep love and devotedness. She takes good care of
that dog. And what makes it harder for her to handle him is, her
dress is so tight, and her sleeves. I s'pose that is why she
can't breathe any better, and what makes her face and hands red,
and kinder swelled up. She can't get her hands to her head to
save her, and if a assassin should strike her, she couldn't raise
her arm to ward off the blow if he killed her. I s'pose it
worrys her.

And she has to put her bunnet on jest as quick as she gets her
petticoats on, for she can't lift he arms to save her life after
she gets her corsets on. She owned up to me once that it made
her feel queer to be a walkin' 'round her room with not much on
only her bunnet all trimmed off with high feathers and artificial
flowers.

But she said she wuz willing to do anythin' necessary, and she
felt that she must have her waist taper, no matter what stood in
the way on't. She loves the looks of a waist that tapers. That
wuz all the fault she found with the Goddus of Liberty
enlightenin' the world in New York Harber. We got to talkin'
about it and she said, "If that Goddus only had corsets on, and
sleeves that wuz skin tight, and her overskirt looped back over a
bustle, it would be perfect!"

But I told her I liked her looks as well ag'in as she wuz. "Why,"
sez I, "How could she lift her torch above her head? And how could
she ever enlighten the world, if she wuz so held down by her corsets
and sleeves that she couldn't wave her torch?"

She see in a minute that it couldn't be done. She owned up that
she couldn't enlighten the world in that condition, but as fur as
looks went, it would be perfectly beautiful.

But I don't think so at all. But, as I say, Miss Flamm has a
real hard time on't, all bard down as she is, and takin' all the
care of that dog, day and night. She is jest devoted to it.

Why jest before we started a little lame girl with a shabby
dress, but a face angel sweet, came to the side of the carriage
to sell some water lilies. Her face looked patient, and wistful,
and she jest held out her flowers silently, and stood with her
bare feet on the wet ground and her pretty eyes lookin' pitifully
into our'n. She wanted to sell 'em awfully, I could see. And I
should have bought the hull of 'em immegitly, my feelin's was
sech, but onfortionably I had left my port-money in my other
pocket, and Josiah said he had left his (mebby he had). But Miss
Flamm would have bought 'em in a minute, I knew, the child's face
looked so mournful and appealin'; she would have bought 'em, but
she wuz so engrossed by the dog; she wuz a holdin' him up in
front of her a admirin' and carressin' of him, so's she never
ketched sight of the lame child.

No body, not the best natured creeter in the world, can see
through a dog when it is held clost up to the eye, closer than
anything else.

Wall, we drove down to what they called Vichy Spring and there on
a pretty pond clost to the springhouse, we see a boat with a
bycycle on it, and a boy a ridin' it. The boat wuz rigged out to
look like a swan with its wings a comin' up each side of the boy.
And down on the water, a sailin' along closely and silently wuz
another swan, a shadow swan, a follerin' it right along. It wuz
a fair seen.

And Josiah sez to me, "He should ride that boat before he left
Saratoga; he said that wuz a undertakin' that a man might be
proud to accomplish."

Sez I, "Josiah Allen, don't you do anything of the kind."

"I MUST, Samantha," sez he. And then he got all animated about
fixin' up a boat like it at home. Sez he, "Don't you think it
would be splendid to have one on the canal jest beyond the
orchard?" And sez he, "Mebby, bein' on a farm, it would be more
appropriate to have a big goose sculptured out on it; don't you
think so?"

Sez I, "Yes, it would be fur more appropriate, and a goose a
ridin' on it. But," sez I, "you will never go into that
undertakin' with my consent, Josiah Allen."

"Why," sez he, "it would be a beautiful recreation; so uneek."

But at that minute Miss Flamm gin the order to turn round and
start for the Moon, or that is how I understood her, and I
whispered to Josiah and sez, "She means to go in the buggy, for
the land's sake!"

And Josiah sez, "Wall, I haint a goin' and you haint. I won't
let you go into anythin' so dangerus. She will probably drive
into a baloon before long, and go up in that way, but jest before
she drives in, you and I will get out, Samantha, if we have to
walk back."

"I never heard of anybody goin' up in a baloon with two horses
and a buggy," sez I.

"Wall, new things are a happenin' all the time, Samantha. And I
heard a feller a talkin' about it yesterday. You know they are a
havin' the big political convention here, and he said, (he wuz a
real cute chap too,) he said, 'if the wind wasted in that
convention could be utilized by pipes goin' up out of the ruff of
that buildin' where it is held,' he said, 'it would take a man up
to the moon.' I heerd him say it. And now, who knows but they
have got it all fixed. There wuz dretful windy speeches there
this mornin'. I hearn 'em, and I'll bet that is her idee, of
bein' the first one to try it; she is so fashionable. But I
haint a goin' up in no sech a way."

"No," sez I. "Nor I nuther. It would be fur from my wishes to
be carried up to the skies on the wind of a political convention.
"Though," sez I reasonably, "I haint a doubt that there wuz
sights, and sights of it used there."

But jest at this minute Miss Flamm got through talkin' with her
relatives about the road, and settled down to caressin' the dog
ag'in, and Josiah hadn't time to remark any further, only to say,
"Watch me, Samantha, and when I say jump, jump."

And then we sot still but watchful. And Miss Flamm kissed the
dog several times and pressed him to her heart that throbbed full
of such a boundless love for him. And he lifted his head and
snapped at a fly, and barked at my companion with a renewed energy,
and showed his intellect and delightful qualities in sech remarkable
ways, that filled Miss Flamm's soul deep with a proud joy in him.
And then he went to sleep a layin, down in her lap, a mashin' down
the delicate lace and embroidery and beads. He had been a eating
the beads, I see him gnaw off more than two dozen of 'em, and I
called her attention to it, but she said, "The dear little darlin'
had to have some such recreation." And she let him go on with it,
a mowin' 'em down, as long as he seemed to have a appetite for 'em.
And ag'in she called him "angel." The idee of a angel a gnawin'
off beads and a yelpin'!

And I asked her, and I couldn't help it. How her baby wuz that
afternoon, and if she ever took it out to drive?

And she said she didn't really know how it wuz this afternoon; it
wuzn't very well in the mornin'. The nurse had it out somewhere,
she didn't really know just where. And she said, no, she didn't
take it out with her at all -- fur she didn't feel equal to the
care of it, in this hot weather.

Miss Flamm haint very well I could see that. The care of that
dog is jest a killin' her, a carryin' it round with her all the
time daytimes, and a bein' up with it so much nights. She said
it had a dretful chill the night before, and she had to get up to
warm blankets to put round it; "its nerves wuz so weak," she
said, "and it wuz so sensative that she could not trust it to a
nurse." She has a hard time of it; there haint a doubt of it.

Wall, it wuz anon, or jest about anon, that Miss Flamm turned to
me and sez, "Moon's is one of the pleasantest places on the lake.
I want you to see it; folks drive out there a sight from
Saratoga."

And then I looked at Josiah, and Josiah looked at me, and peace
and happiness settled down ag'in onto our hearts.

Wall, we got there considerably before anon and we found that
Moon's insted of bein' up in another planet wuz a big, long sort
a low buildin' settled right down onto this old earth, with a
immense piazza stretchin' along the side on't.

And Miss Flamm and Josiah and me disembarked from the carriage
right onto the end of it. But the dog and her relatives stayed
back in the buggy and Josiah spoke bitterly to me ag'in but low,
"They think it would hurt 'em to associate with me a little, dumb
'm; but I am jest as good as they be any day of the week, if I
haint dressed up so fancy."

"That's so," sez I, whisperin' back to him, "and don't let it
worry you a mite. Don't try to act like Haman," sez I. "You are
havin' lots of the good things of this world, and are goin' to
have some fried potatoes. Don't let them two Mordecais at the
gate, poison all your happiness, or you may get come up with jest
as Haman wuz."

"I'd love to hang'em," sez he, "as high as Haman's gallows would
let 'em hang."

"Why," sez I, "they haint injured you in any way. They seem to
eat like perfect gentlemen. A little too exclusive and
aristocratic, mebby, but they haint done nothin' to you."

"No," sez he, "that is the stick on it, here we be, three men
with a lot of wimmen. And they can't associate with me as man
with man, but set off by themselves too dumb proud to say a word
to me, that is the dumb of it."

But at this very minute, before I could rebuke him for his
feerful profanity, Miss Flamm motioned to us to come and take a
seat round a little table, and consequently we sot.

It was a long broad piazza with sights and sights of folks on
it a settin' round little tables like our'n, and all a lookin'
happy, and a laughin', and a talkin' and a drinkin' different
drinks, sech as lemonade, etc., and eatin' fried potatoes and
sech.

And out in the road by which we had come, wuz sights and sights
of vehicles and conveyances of all kinds from big Tally Ho
coaches with four horses on 'em, down to a little two wheeled
buggy. The road wuz full on'em.

In front of us, down at the bottom of a steep though beautiful
hill, lay stretched out the clear blue waters of the lake.
Smooth and tranquil it looked in the light of that pleasant
afternoon, and fur off, over the shinin' waves, lay the island.
And white-sailed boats wuz a sailin' slowly by, and the shadow of
their white sails lay down in the water a floatin' on by the side
of the boats, lookin' some like the wings of that white dove that
used to watch over Lake Saratoga.

And as I looked down on the peaceful seen, the feelin's I had
down in the wild wood, back of the Gizer Spring come back to me.
The waves rolled in softly from fur off, fur off, bringin' a
greetin' to me unbeknown to anybody, unbeknown to me. It come
into my heart unbidden, unsought, from afur, afur.

Where did it come from that news of lands more beautiful than
any that lay round Mr. Moons'es, beautiful as it wuz.

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