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The Trial

C >> Charlotte M. Yonge >> The Trial







CHAPTER II



Good words are silver, but good deeds are gold.
Cecil and Mary


'It has been a very good day, papa; he has enjoyed all his meals,
indeed was quite ravenous. He is asleep now, and looks as
comfortable as possible,' said Ethel, five weeks after Aubrey's
illness had begun.

'Thank God for that, and all His mercy to us, Ethel;' and the long
sigh, the kiss, and dewy eyes, would have told her that there had
been more to exhaust him than his twelve hours' toil, even had she
not partly known what weighed him down.

'Poor things!' she said.

'Both gone, Ethel, both! both!' and as he entered the drawing-room,
he threw himself back in his chair, and gasped with the long-
restrained feeling.

'Both!' she exclaimed. 'You don't mean that Leonard--'

'No, Ethel, his mother! Poor children, poor children!'

'Mrs. Ward! I thought she had only been taken ill yesterday
evening.'

'She only then gave way--but she never had any constitution--she was
done up with nursing--nothing to fall back on--sudden collapse and
prostration--and that poor girl, called every way at once, fancied
her asleep, and took no alarm till I came in this morning and found
her pulse all but gone. We have been pouring down stimulants all
day, but there was no rousing her, and she was gone the first.'

'And Mr. Ward--did he know it?'

'I thought so from the way he looked at me; but speech had long been
lost, and that throat was dreadful suffering. Well, "In their death
they were not divided."'

He shaded his eyes with his hand; and Ethel, leaning against his
chair, could not hinder herself from a shudder at the longing those
words seemed to convey. He felt her movement, and put his arm round
her, saying, 'No, Ethel, do not think I envy them. I might have done
so once--I had not then learnt the meaning of the discipline of being
without her--no, nor what you could do for me, my child, my
children.'

Ethel's thrill of bliss was so intense, that it gave her a sense of
selfishness in indulging personal joy at such a moment; and indeed it
was true that her father had over-lived the first pangs of change and
separation, had formed new and congenial habits, saw the future hope
before him; and since poor Margaret had been at rest, had been
without present anxiety, or the sight of decay and disappointment.
Her only answer was a mute smoothing of his bowed shoulders, as she
said, 'If I could be of any use or comfort to poor Averil Ward, I
could go to-night. Mary is enough for Aubrey.'

'Not now, my dear. She can't stir from the boy, they are giving him
champagne every ten minutes; she has the nurse, and Spencer is
backwards and forwards; I think they will pull him through, but it is
a near, a very near touch. Good, patient, unselfish boy he is too.'

'He always was a very nice boy,' said Ethel; 'I do hope he will get
well. It would be a terrible grief to Aubrey.'

'Yes, I got Leonard to open his lips to-day by telling him that
Aubrey had sent him the grapes. I think he will get through. I hope
he will. He is a good friend for Aubrey. So touching it was this
morning to hear him trying to ask pardon for all his faults, poor
fellow--fits of temper, and the like.'

'That is his fault, I believe,' said Ethel, 'and I always think it a
wholesome one, because it is so visible and unjustifiable, that
people strive against it. And the rest? Was Henry able to see his
father or mother?'

'No, he can scarcely sit up in bed. It was piteous to see him lying
with his door open, listening. He is full of warm sound feeling,
poor fellow. You would like to have heard the fervour with which he
begged me to tell his father to have no fears for the younger ones,
for it should be the most precious task of his life to do a parent's
part by them.'

'Let me see, he is just of Harry's age,' said Ethel, thoughtfully, as
if she had not the strongest faith in Harry's power of supplying a
parent's place.

'Well,' said her father, 'remember, a medical student is an older man
than a lieutenant in the navy. One sees as much of the interior as
the other does of the surface. We must take this young Ward by the
hand, and mind he does not lose his father's practice. Burdon, that
young prig that Spencer got down from London, met me at Gavin's, when
I looked in there on my way home, and came the length of Minster
Street with me, asking what I thought of an opening for a medical
man--partnership with young Ward, &c. I snubbed him so short, that I
fancy I left him thinking whether his nose was on or off his face.'

'He was rather premature.'

'I've settled him any way. I shall do my best to keep the town clear
for that lad; there's not much more for him, as things are now, and
it will be only looking close after him for a few years, which
Spencer and I can very well manage.'

'If he will let you.'

'There! that's the spitefulness of women! Must you be casting up
that little natural spirit of independence against him after the
lesson he has had? I tell you, he has been promising me to look on
me as a father! Poor old Ward! he was a good friend and fellow-
worker. I owe a great deal to him.'

Ethel wondered if he forgot how much of the unserviceableness of his
maimed arm had once been attributed to Mr. Ward's dulness, or how
many times he had come home boiling with annoyance at having been
called in too late to remedy the respectable apothecary's half
measures. She believed that the son had been much better educated
than the father, and after the fearful lesson he had received,
thought he might realize Dr. May's hopes, and appreciate his
kindness. They discussed the relations.

'Ward came as assistant to old Axworthy, and married his daughter; he
had no relations that his son knows of, except the old aunt who left
Averil her £2000.'

'There are some Axworthys still,' said Ethel, 'but not very
creditable people.'

'You may say that,' said Dr. May emphatically. 'There was a
scapegrace brother that ran away, and was heard of no more till he
turned up, a wealthy man, ten or fifteen years ago, and bought what
they call the Vintry Mill, some way on this side of Whitford. He has
a business on a large scale; but Ward had as little intercourse with
him as possible. A terrible old heathen.'

'And the boy that was expelled for bullying Tom is in the business.'

'I hate the thought of that,' said the Doctor. 'If he had stayed on,
who knows but he might have turned out as well as Ned Anderson.'

'Has not he?'

'I'm sure I have no right to say he has not, but he is a flashy slang
style of youth, and I hope the young Wards will keep out of his way.'

'What will become of them? Is there likely to be any provision for
them?'

'Not much, I should guess. Poor Ward did as we are all tempted to do
when money goes through our hands, and spent more freely than I was
ever allowed to do. Costly house, garden, greenhouses--he'd better
have stuck to old Axworthy's place in Minster Street--daughter at
that grand school, where she cost more than the whole half-dozen of
you put together.'

'She was more worth it,' said Ethel; 'her music and drawing are
first-rate. Harry was frantic about her singing last time he was at
home--one evening when Mrs. Anderson abused his good-nature and got
him to a tea-party--I began to be afraid of the consequences.'

'Pish!' said the Doctor.

'And really they kept her there to enable her to educate her
sisters,' said Ethel. 'The last time I called on poor Mrs. Ward, she
told me all about it, apologizing in the pretty way mothers do,
saying she was looking forward to Averil's coming home, but that
while she profited so much, they felt it due to her to give her every
advantage; and did not I think--with my experience--that it was all
so much for the little ones' benefit? I assured her, from my
personal experience, that ignorance is a terrible thing in
governessing one's sisters. Poor thing! And Averil had only come
home this very Easter.'

'And with everything to learn, in such a scene as that! The first
day, when only the boys were ill, there sat the girl, dabbling with
her water-colours, and her petticoats reaching half across the room,
looking like a milliner's doll, and neither she nor her poor mother
dreaming of her doing a useful matter.'

'Who is spiteful now, papa? That's all envy at not having such an
accomplished daughter. When she came out in time of need so grandly,
and showed all a woman's instinct--'

'Woman's nonsense! Instinct is for irrational brutes, and the more
you cultivate a woman, the less she has of it, unless you work up her
practical common sense too.'

'Some one said she made a wonderful nurse.'

'Wonderful? Perhaps so, considering her opportunities, and she does
better with Spencer than with me; I may have called her to order
impatiently, for she is nervous with me, loses her head, and knocks
everything down with her petticoats. Then--not a word to any one,
Ethel--but imagine her perfect blindness to her poor mother's state
all yesterday, and last night, not even calling Burdon to look at
her; why, those ten hours may have made all the difference!'

'Poor thing, how is she getting on now?'

'Concentrated upon Leonard, too much stunned to admit another idea--
no tears--hardly full comprehension. One can't take her away, and
she can't bear not to do everything, and yet one can't trust her any
more than a child.'

'As she is,' said Ethel, 'but as she won't be any longer. And the
two little ones?'

'It breaks one's heart to see them, just able to sit by their nursery
fire, murmuring in that weary, resigned, sick child's voice, 'I wish
nurse would come.' 'I wish sister would come.' 'I wish mamma would
come.' I went up to them the last thing, and told them how it was,
and let them cry themselves to sleep. That was the worst business of
all. Ethel, are they too big for Mary to dress some dolls for them?'

'I will try to find out their tastes the first thing to-morrow,' said
Ethel; 'at any rate we can help them, if not poor Averil.'

Ethel, however, was detained at home to await Dr. Spencer's visit,
and Mary, whose dreams had all night been haunted by the thought of
the two little nursery prisoners, entreated to go with her father,
and see what could be done for them.

Off they set together, Mary with a basket in her hand, which was
replenished at the toy-shop in Minster Street with two china-faced
dolls, and, a little farther on, parted with a couple of rolls,
interspersed with strata of cold beef and butter, to a household of
convalescents in the stage for kitchen physic.

Passing the school, still taking its enforced holiday, the father and
daughter traversed the bridge and entered the growing suburb known as
Bankside, where wretched cottages belonging to needy, grasping
proprietors, formed an uncomfortable contrast to the villa residences
interspersed among them.

One of these, with a well-kept lawn, daintily adorned with the newest
pines and ornamental shrubs, and with sheets of glass glaring in the
sun from the gardens at the back, was the house that poor Mr. and
Mrs. Ward had bought and beautified; 'because it was so much better
for the children to be out of the town.' The tears sprang into
Mary's eyes at the veiled windows, and the unfeeling contrast of the
spring glow of flowering thorn, lilac, laburnum, and, above all, the
hard, flashing brightness of the glass; but tears were so unlike
Ethel that Mary always was ashamed of them, and disposed of them
quietly.

They rang, but in vain. Two of the servants were ill, and all in
confusion; and after waiting a few moments among the azaleas in the
glass porch, Dr. May admitted himself, and led the way up-stairs with
silent footfalls, Mary following with breath held back. A voice from
an open door called, 'Is that Dr. May?' and he paused to look in and
say, 'I'll be with you in one minute, Henry; how is Leonard?'

'No worse, they tell me; I say, Dr. May--'

'One moment;' and turning back to Mary, he pointed along a dark
passage. 'Up there, first door to the right. You can't mistake;'
then disappeared, drawing the door after him.

Much discomfited, Mary nevertheless plunged bravely on, concluding
'there' to be up a narrow, uncarpeted stair, with a nursery wicket at
the top, in undoing which, she was relieved of all doubts and
scruples by a melancholy little duet from within. 'Mary, Mary, we
want our breakfast! We want to get up! Mary, Mary, do come! please
come!'

She was instantly in what might ordinarily have been a light,
cheerful room, but which was in all the dreariness of gray cinders,
exhausted night-light, curtained windows, and fragments of the last
meal. In each of two cane cribs was sitting up a forlorn child, with
loose locks of dishevelled hair, pale thin cheeks glazed with tears,
staring eyes, and mouths rounded with amaze at the apparition. One
dropped down and hid under the bed-clothes; the other remained
transfixed, as her visitor advanced, saying, 'Well, my dear, you
called Mary, and here I am.'

'Not our own Mary,' said the child, distrustfully.

'See if I can't be your own Mary.'

'You can't. You can't give us our breakfast.'

'Oh, I am so hungry!' from the other crib; and both burst into the
feeble sobs of exhaustion. Recovering from fever, and still fasting
at half-past nine! Mary was aghast, and promised an instant supply.

'Don't go;' and a bird-like little hand seized her on either side.
'Mary never came to bed, and nobody has been here all the morning,
and we can't bear to be alone.'

'I was only looking for the bell.'

'It is of no use; Minna did jump out and ring, but nobody will come.'

Mary made an ineffectual experiment, and then persuaded the children
to let her go by assurances of a speedy return. She sped down,
brimming over with pity and indignation, to communicate to her father
this cruel neglect, and as she passed Henry Ward's door, and heard
several voices, she ventured on a timid summons of 'papa,' but,
finding it unheard, she perceived that she must act for herself.
Going down-stairs, she tried the sitting-room doors, hoping that
breakfast might be laid out there, but all were locked; and at last
she found her way to the lower regions, guided by voices in eager
tones of subdued gossip.

There, in the glow of the huge red fire, stood a well-covered table,
surrounded by cook, charwoman, and their cavaliers, discussing a pile
of hot-buttered toast, to which the little kitchen-maid was
contributing large rounds, toasted at the fire.

Mary's eyes absolutely flashed, as she said, 'The children have had
no breakfast.'

'I beg your pardon, ma'am,' and the cook rose, 'but it is the nurse-
maid that takes up the young ladies' meals.'

Mary did not listen to the rest; she was desperate, and pouncing on
the bread with one hand, and the butter with the other, ran away with
them to the nursery, set them down, and rushed off for another raid.
She found that the commotion she had excited was resulting in the
preparation of a tray.

'I am sure, ma'am, I am very sorry,' said the cook, insisting on
carrying the kettle, 'but we are in such confusion; and the nurse-
maid, whose place it is, has been up most of the night with Mr.
Leonard, and must have just dropped asleep somewhere, and I was just
giving their breakfast to the undertaker's young men, but I'll call
her directly, ma'am.'

'Oh, no, on no account. I am sure she ought to sleep,' said Mary.
'It was only because I found the little girls quite starving that I
came down. I will take care of them now. Don't wake her, pray.
Only I hope,' and Mary looked beseechingly, 'that they will have
something good for their dinner, poor little things.'

Cook was entirely pacified, and talked about roast chicken, and
presently the little sisters were sitting up in their beds, each in
her wrapper, being fed by turns with delicately-buttered slices, Mary
standing between like a mother-bird feeding her young, and pleased to
find the eyes grow brighter and less hollow, the cheeks less wan, the
voices less thin and pipy, and a little laugh breaking out when she
mistook Minna for Ella.

While tidying the room, she was assailed with entreaties to call
their Mary, and let them get up, they were so tired of bed. She
undertook to be still their Mary, and made them direct her to the
house-maid's stores, went down on her knees at the embers, and so
dealt with matches, chips, and coal, that to her own surprise and
pride a fire was evoked.

'But,' said Ella, 'I thought you were a Miss May.'

'So I am, my dear.'

'But ladies don't light fires,' said Minna, in open-eyed perplexity.

'Oh,' exclaimed the younger sister, 'you know Henry said he did not
think any of the Miss Mays were first-rate, and that our Ave beat
them all to nothing.'

The elder, Minna, began hushing; and it must be confessed that honest
Mary was not superior to a certain crimson flush of indignation, as
she held her head into the grate, and thought of Ethel, Flora, and
Blanche, criticized by Mr. Henry Ward. Little ungrateful chit! No,
it was not a matter of laughing, but of forgiveness; and the
assertion of the dignity of usefulness was speedily forgotten in the
toilette of the small light skin-and-bone frames, in the course of
which she received sundry compliments--'her hands were so nice and
soft,' 'she did not pull their hair like their own Mary,' 'they
wished she always dressed them.'

The trying moment was when they asked if they might kneel at her lap
for their prayers. To Mary, the twelve years seemed as nothing since
her first prayers after the day of terror and bereavement, and her
eyes swam with tears as the younger girl unthinkingly rehearsed her
wonted formula, and the elder, clinging to her, whispered gravely,
'Please, what shall I say?'

With full heart, and voice almost unmanageable, Mary prompted the few
simple words that had come to her in that hour of sorrow. She looked
up, from stooping to the child's ear, to see her father at the door,
gazing at them with face greatly moved. The children greeted him
fondly, and he sat down with one on each knee, and caressed them as
he looked them well over, drawing out their narration of the
wonderful things 'she' had done, the fingers pointing to designate
who she was. His look at her over his spectacles made Mary's heart
bound and feel compensated for whatever Mr. Henry Ward might say of
her. When the children had finished their story, he beckoned her out
of the room, promising them that he would not keep her long.

'Well done, Molly,' he said smiling, 'it is well to have daughters
good for something. You had better stay with them till that poor
maid has had her sleep out, and can come to them.'

'I should like to stay with them all day, only that Ethel must want
me.'

'You had better go home by dinner-time, that Ethel may get some air.
Perhaps I shall want one of you in the evening to be with them at the
time of the funeral.'

'So soon!'

'Yes, it must be. Better for all, and Henry is glad it should be so.
He is out on the sofa to-day, but he is terribly cut up.'

'And Leonard?'

'I see some improvement--Burdon does not--but I think with Heaven's
good mercy we may drag him through; the pulse is rather better. Now
I must go. You'll not wait dinner for me.'

Mary spent the next hour in amusing the children by the fabrication
of the dolls' wardrobe, and had made them exceedingly fond of her, so
that there was a very poor welcome when their own Mary at length
appeared, much shocked at the duration of her own slumbers, and
greatly obliged to Miss May. The little girls would scarcely let
Mary go, though she pacified them by an assurance that she or her
sister would come in the evening.

'Don't let it be your sister. You come, and finish our dolls'
frocks!' and they hung about her, kissing her, and trying to extract
a promise.

After sharing the burthen of depression, it was strange to return
home to so different a tone of spirits when she found Aubrey
installed in Ethel's room as his parlour, very white and weak, but
overflowing with languid fun. There was grief and sympathy for the
poor Wards, and anxious inquiries for Leonard; but it was not sorrow
brought visibly before him, and after the decorous space of
commiseration, the smiles were bright again, and Mary heard how her
father had popped in to boast of his daughter being 'as good as a
house-maid, or as Miss What's-her-name;' and her foray in the kitchen
was more diverting to Aubrey than she was as yet prepared to
understand. 'Running away with the buttered toast from under the
nose of a charwoman! let Harry never talk of taking a Chinese battery
after that!' her incapacity of perceiving that the deed was either
valiant or ludicrous, entertaining him particularly. 'It had
evidently hit the medium between the sublime and ridiculous.'

When evening came, Mary thought it Ethel's privilege to go, as the
most efficient friend and comforter; but Ethel saw that her sister's
soul was with the Wards, and insisted that she should go on as she
had begun.

'O, Ethel, that was only with the little ones. Now you would be of
use to poor Averil.'

'And why should not you? and of more use?'

'You know I am only good for small children; but if you tell me--'

'You provoking girl,' said Ethel. 'All I tell you is, that you are
twenty-three years old, and I won't tell you anything, nor assist
your unwholesome desire to be second fiddle.'

'I don't know what you mean, Ethel; of course you always tell me what
to do, and how to do it.'

Ethel quite laughed now, but gave up the contest, only saying, as she
fondly smoothed back a little refractory lock on Mary's smooth open
brow, 'Very well then, go and do whatever comes to hand at Bankside,
my dear. I do really want to stay at home, both on Aubrey's account,
and because papa says Dr. Spencer is done up, and that I must catch
him and keep him quiet this evening.'

Mary was satisfied in her obedience, and set off with her father.
Just as they reached Bankside, a gig drove up containing the fattest
old man she had ever beheld; her father whispered that it was old Mr.
Axworthy, and sent her at once to the nursery, where she was welcomed
with a little shriek of delight, each child bounding in her small
arm-chair, and pulling her down between them on the floor for
convenience of double hugging, after which she was required to go on
with the doll-dressing.

Mary could not bear to do this while the knell was vibrating on her
ear, and the two coffins being borne across the threshold; so she
gathered the orphans within her embrace as she sat on the floor, and
endeavoured to find out how much they understood of what was passing,
and whether they had any of the right thoughts. It was rather
disappointing. The little sisters had evidently been well and
religiously taught, but they were too childish to dwell on thoughts
of awe or grief, and the small minds were chiefly fixed upon the
dolls, as the one bright spot in the dreary day. Mary yielded, and
worked and answered their chatter till twilight came on, and the
rival Mary came up to put them to bed, an operation in which she gave
her assistance, almost questioning if she were not forgotten, but she
learnt that her father was still in the house, the nurse believed
looking at papers in Mr. Henry's room with the other gentlemen.

'And you will sit by us while we go to sleep. Oh! don't go away!'

The nurse was thankful to her for so doing, and a somewhat graver
mood had come over Minna as she laid her head on her pillow, for she
asked the difficult question, 'Can mamma see us now?' which Mary
could only answer with a tender 'Perhaps,' and an attempt to direct
the child to the thought of the Heavenly Father; and then Minna
asked, 'Who will take care of us now?'

'Oh, will you?' cried Ella, sitting up; and both little maids,
holding out their arms, made a proffer of themselves to be her little
children. They would be so good if she would let them be--

Mary could only fondle and smile it off, and put them in mind that
they belonged to their brother and sister; but the answer was, 'Ave
is not so nice as you. Oh, do let us--'

'But I can't, my dears. I am Dr. May's child, you know. What could
I say to him?'

'Oh! but Dr. May wouldn't mind! I know he wouldn't mind! Mamma says
there was never any one so fond of little children, and he is such a
dear good old gentleman.'

Mary had not recognized him as an old gentleman at fifty-eight, and
did not like it at all. She argued on the impracticability of taking
them from their natural protectors, and again tried to lead them
upwards, finally betaking herself to the repetition of hymns, which
put them to sleep. She had spent some time in sitting between them
in the summer darkness, when there was a low tap, and opening the
door, she saw her father. Indicating that they slept, she followed
him out, and a whispered conference took place as he stood below her
on the stairs, their heads on a level.

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